A while back, we wrote about an event we attended to celebrate one of Kingston High School’s sports teams in the KHS cafeteria. One of the highlights of the night was when I sat with a group of kids and they didn’t totally roll their eyes. Instead, we engaged in some adult-led conversation. As we talked, the topic of cell phones in the classroom arose. (I swear I didn’t bring this up!) “We only use our phones when we’re done with the rest of our work” explained one kid. Another emphasized that the phone is also a tool to help get work done. As a professor of graduate students at Columbia University, this sounded fishy. I have to constantly remind my own students to put their screens away. How could these KHS students be showing greater restraint and maturity?

I asked Jim, who has mentioned more than a few times that phones in his classroom are a problem. “Are they really only using them after they are done with their work?” “No way,” he replied.” According to Jim, in his and many others’ classrooms, kids are pulling their cell phones out more than they realize. “It’s an addiction,” he said.

I have always felt that cell phone addiction was more of an exaggeration than a truth. But Jim teaches his students that mobile phones, much like drugs, alcohol and tobacco, release dopamine and leave you wanting more and more. My tough guy sets a pretty high standard for resisting this addiction — he turns his phone off by dinner time and has only downloaded three apps for it.

For the rest of us, phones can be a problem. A survey of 1,000 Americans released by reviews.org in 2023 revealed that 57 percent consider themselves “addicted” to their phones. We check our phones on average 144 times per day — that’s about once every 15 waking minutes.

What’s worse, we get anxiety just thinking about our phones. Seventy-five percent of us feel uneasy leaving our phones at home and the same amount check our phones within five minutes of receiving a notification. (Yes, a notification, not a text message!)

A lot of KHS teachers “enforce” policy differently. But study after study shows that excessive cell phone use can lead to depression, loneliness, anxiety and sleep deprivation. That can, in turn, lead to poor performance at school. So, I asked Jim, as a health teacher and public health professional, why he doesn’t enforce a no-cell phone use policy in the classroom. “Keeping things from addicts doesn’t work, they are just left wanting more.” I sighed. “Then what are we supposed to do? If it’s an addiction, how would we treat any other addiction?”

Jim’s advice is mind-blowingly simple and really hard. “Addicts need to bond with something else.” His advice is to help kids bond and create meaningful relationships. His approach is to build interesting discussions and learner-led dialogue in the classroom that hopefully keeps more kids engaged and off their devices.

This is hard work. At the school level, KHS is planning to use Yonder pouches next year to keep phones out of kids’ reach while they learn. If you aren’t familiar with them — I wasn’t — they are basically neoprene purses that kids carry their phones around in. They have magnetic locks that can only be opened by school staff when a class is over. You can find more information on these on the KHS website if you want to start getting your teens ready for the change in policy.

This attempt at changing behavior is well-meaning, but without the hard work of building engaging conversations and opportunities for real relationships, it may fall short of helping get to the root of the problem. Kids are lonely, and they need to bond with someone or something. So, as you make plans this summer, include a teenager: yours or someone close. Teach them a new skill, have them do yard work around your house or just eat some meals together. They need to get used to the joy that life brings when you aren’t on your phone.

Barbara Magnoni and Jim Rich are Kingston Wire subscribers, and co-founders of the Hudson Valley Plant Exchange, living in Kingston. Rich is a coach and health teacher at Kingston High School.